London

My friend has invited me to go to London with her and my other friend in two days time and it's going to be so much fun. We're going to get to go shopping and get loads of nice new clothes and we're going to have so much fun messing together and having a laugh ect.

I don't want to go.

What's wrong with me?
Anyone would jump at the mere sight of a free holiday right? Not this girl. I just keep thinking about all the negatives to going.
Negative number 1 (and the main one): My friend is fat (I know that's mean to say but hey, she is) and she eats alot and all the time and her mom loves to feed her and anyone else nearby (ie. us, her friends) so they'll do they're best to fatten me up if I go and I'm weak at the moment, I don't know if i'll be able to argue my case with them. It's so much work having to think of new excuses and when your staying with people you can hardly say you'll eat later now can you?
Negative number 2: I hate packing and I have no clothes. I know I'll get clothes when I'm there but I really don't want to have to spend hours going through my wardrobe looking for clothes I don't feel like a whale in. Then there's the fact everyone in London will have amazing clothes and amazing style and they'll just look amazing compared to me the big ugly elephant staring at them.
Negative number 3: Cuts. Having to hide them. they always ask me why I wear my bracelets to bed at sleepovers and that's just for one day, this'll be for three. And as with negative number 1 I'm too tired to have to find explinations. Also in accordance to negative 1, if I get really down by being forced to eat by them I might want to cut, you can't bring razors onto planes now can you? I'm going to be in such a bad mood if I can't get my release (I sound like a druggie).
And negative number infinity: I'm a lazy spoil sport who is afraid to do things in case they go wrong. Here's where people would normally say FML but I don't do that so i'll just stick to saying "Fuck!"

On a plus (I always try and have one, sorry, this'll be long), I went out last night for the first time in months. For once I didn't completely lie to my Dad. Usually I'd tell him I was going to the cinema or something and then go out drinking in some park with my friends. This time I couldn't have possibly lied as it was this guys birthday and everyone was going to the pub at 8 and then clubbing at like 1am or something. So I told him it was one of the girls birthday and we were going to go for a chinese and then to the pub as she was going to be 18 and wanted to have a drink to  celebrate. Now my dad hasn't a clue I drink so he didn't mind me going. I ended up drinking a naggen of vodka in the space of about ten minutes and then getting a double vodka and orange juice in the pub. I haven't been drunk since early last July so this was alot to me. I ended up spending all night trying to sober up lol. I went home then and my dad knew well I was drunk. He said I was slurring my words. I told him I had some smirnoff ice which isn't really drinking and now he's calling me an alco. I'd love to see his face if he knew I was downing a naggen ten minutues after he dropped me at the Chinese. Or if he knew I've been drinking since I was 14. Or that I've drank a litre of vodka in one night because I though this girl was trying to steal my drink and the only place she couldn't reach it from was my stomach so I drank it all really quickly. I also think I smoked last night. Just cigarettes but still, I hate smoking. I also tried to sneak into the club because I haven't got my fake ID made yet. I have a template and now all I have to do is put a picture into it and laminate it and I'll be good to go. My friend finished making her's and she got into a club last night (Not the one I was at though) so I know it'll work.
My dad is also going away next Friday until Sunday so I'm going clubbing in town with a girl I haven't seen in ages as she moved schools and then on Saturday I'm going to a guy in my years birthday so this weekend should be good.

I'm determined to make this week good as I'm on midterm now and when I go back to school I'll have to study study study (damn school <.<)

Sorry for the long boring story.
By bye.
Xx